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the decision needs to be left to Dad. She said, He thinks clearly,
logically, and his conclusions are not always what you want to hear,
but usually he s correct. She said that, Dad and you should go
out and enjoy yourselves. She went on to say, Don t spend your
time crying over me. Do something fun. Then the words of a song
came to me, Yesterday is dead and gone and tomorrow s looking
bright. Hold back the tears and open yourself up. There is a whole
world waiting out there. Finally, before leaving I got the message,
You know you were thinking about spreading my ashes here in the
canyon. I don t think so. I want to be on the nightstand in a nice
warm house. I later realized that Sharon was the only one who
called the pedestal in her bedroom a nightstand. The last thing
said was, You look pretty stupid in that red hat and stuff. I had
put on a red fleece hat earlier in the morning when it was so cold.
She went on to say, It s nice what these people are doing [meaning
Hanbleca], but I don t think I could have done it. Too bad Chris
didn t come. I would have liked to talk to him, too. I am glad you
came, I like the Southwest, sunshine and all, desert and cactus.
She mentioned the beetle that had been visiting my Hochaka and
said, He is more afraid of you and you need to grow up.
I didn t feel her presence anymore and felt she had gone.
Saturday afternoon I got some sage from my backpack and began
to look at it very closely. It was stuck together and appeared very
rigid. I started to take the sage, pull it apart ever so gently so it was
not as rigid, and make it more flexible. It really looked beautiful
when the leaves were open. The more rigid the leaves were, the
As The Eagle Cries___________________________ 97
more they broke when I tried to pull them apart. I realized the
more rigid one is in life in one s thinking and being resistant, the
more one is apt to break. Whereas if one can become more flexible,
life is more beautiful.
Saturday evening I couldn t sleep. I tossed and turned, and my
stomach was upset. I finally decided to lie on my back, and I looked
up at the tree above me. I guessed it was about midnight, and the
moon was full. I first heard a voice singing, Listen to the story of
a soul s journey. I saw in the tree above me a vision of a Native
American young woman with braided black hair coming over her
shoulders and dressed in white. I then saw Sharon, also dressed
in white and her hair down and flowing freely as she sometimes
wore it. Sharon was packing a suitcase. The next picture I saw was
Sharon s body on a bed and two people administering to it and her
body was halfway off the bed. Next I saw a staircase behind them.
Sharon was now standing up and looking at the staircase. She was
being encouraged to climb that staircase. Sharon was very hesitant,
and it took a long time, but she finally climbed one stair. To the
right of this scene I saw on one of the branches of the tree a Native
American dressed in ceremonial dress and the words came, I am
Chief Phil Crazy Bull and Sharon has gone to be with the White
Buffalo Calf Woman, but her body will remain a while longer. At
first astonished at what I saw, I questioned it. It certainly did look
like the Medicine Man, but how could he be so small and on the
branch of the tree above me? At the same time I felt reassured he
was there, since it was the middle of the night and I was seeing all
these visions. The next scene was more powerful than what I had
seen previously. To the left of the tree was Sharon again. She spoke
to me in a song. The melody was similar to a song I had heard many
years ago from the Sound of Music movie and she sang, Good-bye,
Good-bye, Good-bye. To the left of the tree she appeared again
and this time sitting inside the center of a tulip on a flower petal.
98 ___________________________Carol A. Freeman
She said, I love you. Tell Dad I love him. Tell Chris I love him and
Heidi. A little baby is coming. There should be no guilt. The last
thing she said was, Dad doesn t have to make this decision. After
hearing this the message came, from where I do not know, that
things happened the way they were suppose to. I saw a Phoenix
bird in the tree and Sharon was arising from the center of it. I
turned onto my left side. I felt I needed a break and was feeling
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